The Circle

Memorial Weekend 2009 was the Simpson Family Reunion. My two daughters and their families came and we all stayed at my parents home on Sam Rayburn. My dad is almost 83 and he takes care of my mother and most all the everyday concerns of keeping up a home and property. My mother turned 79 on December 18, 2008. She is still beautiful. Her hair is silver and her eyes are still an unusual light blue ... sometimes they sparkle like they use to when I was a child ... but much too often, she doesn't really remember who she is ... are where she is. If she sleeps during the day, she thinks it is a new morning (maybe that is not all bad) ... at least that is one way of getting two days out of one! Our family loves to eat and talk and we all love children. Seven of my precious grandchildren, who attended the reuion, hunted lizards, ran with the their distant cousins, laughing over everything, beating a pinata till the candy fell out ... my precious Emma even managed to head-lock an unruly older male second-cousin at the pure delight of her mother's only 1st female cousin ... Angie is still laughing about that.

I've always loved to climb in bed with my parents and visit. As a child, they said I would lay between them and listen to radio programs with them till I feel asleep. Then daddy would put me in my bed ... my bed was a dresser drawer until I outgrew it. So Saturday night with my husband asleep in our bed, my adult children in their beds, my seven grandchildren sleeping scattered on padlets across the living room floor along side of Scratch, (my parent's hugh chow-lab mixed dog) ... I crawled in bed with mother and daddy. Daddy turned on his left side and was asleep in all of 5 minutes. Mother and I talked a bit about the day. She was very content, then she drew close to me and laid her head on my shoulder, I wrapped my arms around her and she went to sleep. So many times ... I remember my mother holding me in her arms just as I now held her. When I knew she was soundly asleep, I kissed them both goodnight, neither one moved ... I crawled from their bed and gently closed the door. Everyone was asleep ... In the living room, I looked over my sweet babies with that lion of a dog semingly keeping each one safe, and I felt that peace that I was taught about as a child ... the peace that passes all understanding. Life is good.

January 01, 2009

I watched the sunrise this first morning of 2009. The palate was awash with purples, pinks and oranges ... forty years ago I was waiting the birth of my first child. Time travel is real ... remembering that time puts me back in that moment amid the smells, sounds and exciting feeling of new life stirring inside me ... recalling all the love and expectations feels me with joy. His precious face is fresh in my mind, new little fingers wrapping around my one seemingly large ring finger, his large soulful eyes searching my face, his scent lingers in my senses. He was the center of my universe ... tiny, fascinating and beautiful ... a gift and a trust from God.I will hold that beautiful memory I was given this morning and face the New Year with gratitude and excited expectation for the life I am living.

Carlene

Little sister Carlene slept soundly beside Anna. Her breathe was soft, erythematic. Grandma liked to sleep with the windows open. Sometimes that seemed a little scary but tonight with Grandma and Granddaddy talking softly in then next room, the night sounds were comforting. It had been a great day with aroma of Grandma’s cooking filling the air. Anna had spent the day playing with her cousins.
Now, snuggled comfortably in Grandma’s big feather bed, Anna watched the stars, thanked God for a perfect day and prayed for tomorrow to be just like today. It felt good to have her family all together, singing songs and playing games. Pulling the colorful homemade quilt up to her neck, she turned toward her sister and watched as Carlene’s little chest moved gently up and down.
Tiny whisks of syrup colored hair framed her sister’s little angle face. Anna smiled at thinking her sister was an angel. She remembered how earlier in the day Carlene persuaded their younger cousins that her way was the “right” way. Carlene had a little of Tom Sawyer in her. Grandma told Carlene to tidy up the play yard. Carlene had somehow convinced her cousin that the cleaning was a fun part of play. Anna watched as Carlene played Mommy, rocking her baby doll as Cousin Treat happily worked to clean their “house”.
Anna snuggled into her pillow drifting in and out of sleep. She was looking forward to the morning. Anna knew that when the sun peaked through her window and the night mist still covered the ground, Grandma would be in the kitchen making biscuits and cream gravy for breakfast for her “girls”. Grandma’s love was the best of all. This was Anna’s last thought as she closed her eyes to sleep.

July 17 Waltz

Almost thirteen years ago, my friend, Jackie, gave me some CD’s when my husband Larry died. The three of us were childhood friends, our ties run strong and deep. My friend has a poet’s soul and he gave me music to help heal my broken heart. Time seemed to stand still for me that first year and the music rocked me in its arms, caressing and soothing my heart, nurturing me with tender memories and promises of joy to come.

Everyday chores help to keep me grounded … cleaning floors, washing dishes … putting my house in order. I did those things then and that is what I did today. I found one of my old CD’s, opened my house and worked. I accomplished much and feel really good with my house in order. Somewhere during this timeless day ... the music recalled the steps of that first year …I began to waltz ... a slow, rhythmic dance of shared undying love … joy filled my heart and reminded that there is so much more to life than I can see .

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